ProjectXY

This is the post where, if you are impressionable, you should stop reading. Everything went a bit fuzzy at this time but I’ll try to describe as much as possible.

Pain was becoming really unbearable, and after a while they finally found me a room.  It looked like (for a change) they were under staffed so the midwife couldn’t be with me the whole time. She strapped the baby heart monitor and the contractions monitor on me, gave me the gas and air, made sure I didn’t feel the need to push and off she went. She told me to press the button if we needed anything or if I wanted to push.

The contractions were getting stronger and stronger and the gas and air doesn’t exactly take the pain away. I’d never been in labour before, Russ and Maria had never seen one, so we were clueless on what to do. The useless ante-natal class didn’t include exactly what happens during labour and how to breathe and what to expect. I wasn’t breathing the gas and air properly and the pain became so strong I lost control. I’ve never felt so much pain in my life! It got to a point where I couldn’t breathe anymore, threw the gas and air away and screamed like hell! More like grunting really.

I have a faint recollection that Russ and Maria were talking to me but I couldn’t hear them anymore. I didn’t listen to them, and even if I could hear them, what do they know? I assume they were telling me to breathe deeply but I couldn’t do it. It didn’t take long until I started feeling the need to push. I told them (shouted): ‘press the button I want to push’ Russ didn’t believe me and kept telling me to calm down. At the third ‘press the damn button I want to push’  I took it and pressed it myself. The midwife came immediately, examined me and said: ‘it looks like this baby is about to be born’. She put on a serious face, told me off for wasting my much needed energy on the screaming, and started getting ready. Somehow, now that I had someone who knew what they were doing there, I started to calm down under her instructions. It took a bit but soon I was breathing properly and the pain was not as bad (although still the worst I’ve ever felt). For some reason I didn’t believe the baby was coming anytime soon. It was like I never thought I would get rid of that excruciating pain.

A few minutes later she was telling me to hold my legs and start pushing. Pushing??? I couldn’t push! I was too tired and the pain was too much! I didn’t even knew what kind of pushing she was talking about! A few more instructions later and I did start to push. The problem is that you can only push while you’re having a contraction and mine were too short. I could only manage one bit push and the second one was interrupted.

She said she could see the head :O And again I didn’t believe her. Russ saw it too and I still didn’t believe it! I thought they were lying. Why on Earth would they lie I have no idea. But I thought that it was to soon and I would be in pain for a lot longer and they were just trying to trick me into keep going. You completely lose your sanity… The thing is I could only feel the contractions. I could not feel her head coming. So all I had was their word because for me the baby was still way inside.The midwife even asked if I wanted to touch the head. I “said” Noooo! I just wanted it to end! A few pushes later and I did feel her head! Because of the short contractions one of the pushes stopped half way through and her head got stuck. The midwife said that it was a very uncomfortable position for both me and the baby and That I need to push harder. I heard her say push harder, push slowly, all kinds of things but it was all like in a dream. I don’t know if it was the gas and air or the pain but it all felt very surreal.

A couple of pushes later and the head got out. I did feel that. It stung like hell. And the next push the body was out in a gush and I felt the biggest relief in my life. My bump dropped, all the pain and all the tension stopped immediately  I sat up to see my lovely daughter born. She was a bit blue but she started crying immediately and seconds later she was in my arms . And she stopped crying! And I started! She was beautiful!!!

All in all it seems like it was a very quick labour. Especially for a first one.

More gruesome details on the next post

It’s been a while since I wrote here and it might be a while longer until I write again. I have been quite busy.

I have decided that I should write something about my experience with labour and maybe carry on with this blog writing about this wonderful world of parenthood. It will be good to come back in a few years time and read everything

As I have little time available to write and there is a lot to say I though I may as well do it in parts.

It all began on Sunday the 7th February. My dad and stepmum had arrived a few days earlier and we decided to go out for a meal with Russ’s parents and siblings to introduce Maria to them. Russ was also going to play the monthly football match with other members of his family so we decided to put it all together.

We went out for a meal on a pub and I began not feeling very well. I was tired and my stomach was uncomfortable. I thought it might have been a bug or something. Anyways we went to see the boys play football and I was feeling worse and worse. I told Russ that I really wasn’t feeling well. Someone said joking that if Russ scored a hat trick then she would be born that day. Russ did and asked me : ” So where is that baby?”

We came home and there were no signs of me getting better. I started to find it odd as when I have an upset stomach it usually doesn’t last as long.

I started watching a film with Maria. I will never forget – The Devil Wears Prada. I started to realise that the pain would come and go but it was quite irregular so made nothing of it. Went to bed and the pain continued. I couldn’t sleep and I could tell that it would come and go so I started wondering if they were contractions. At 1am I was sitting in the study browsing the web looking for what contractions are supposed to feel like. In the end I reached no conclusions. They could be contractions or not. I started timing them and they were very irregular, sometimes 10 min apart sometimes 5.

When back to bed, woke up Russ and told him to be prepared just in case. The pain started to become stronger and after an hour or so I gave up and asked Russ to take me to the hospital. We woke up my family and told them we would let them know what happened. Chances were that even if they were contractions I would be sent home for a bit longer.

When we got to the hospital they put me in the observation room strapped on to monitors to check the contractions and the baby’s heart beat. I had the confirmation. They were contractions (at that point I still didn’t want to keep my hopes up) and I was 1 cm dilated. They did send me home but I had to stay a bit longer because they wanted to monitor the baby properly and apparently she was in a deep sleep! Deep sleep??? There I was in pain and she was in deep sleep??? Some nerve The midwife told me that when it got to the point where I couldn’t smile between contractions it was time to go back to the hospital.

When I got hope my dad and Maria were getting ready to go out and meet us. We got home just in time to stop them. I tried to rest a bit more. But the contractions were getting really strong. I started to struggle with the pain. When it got to around 8am I couldn’t cope anymore and decided I needed pain killers. Paracetamol was not doing the trick.

We got in the car and this time Maria came with us. My dad stayed at home as we were waiting for a mattress delivery (good timing). There was a lot of traffic and it was hell. The pain was really strong and we were getting nowhere near the hospital I definitely could not smile any more and could not hide the pain I was feeling.

We finally got there and I was happy to find that I could have 2 birth partners so Maria could come in with us I went to the monitoring room again and was told I was 5 cm dilated already! She was on her way!

I’m sure that Russ will soon write a bit more about the experience of becoming new parents and I will add my posts as well (if I can find the time).

There is something I want to say before anything else. I am amazed with all the help and support I was given by the Derby hospital staff. It went way beyond my expectations and it made things a lot easier. Babies don’t come with instructions and there is a lot to learn. There was always someone available to help with everything and they were all wonderful, even though they were way under staffed.

No signs at all. No show, no contractions, not even milk leaks… And after 7 first babies I know being born from one month to a couple of days early it’s getting quite frustrating. Only mine left and it doesn’t look like she will follow the trend of being early or even on time.

Lots of people said she would be early but I really don’t think it will happen. I am prepared to wait a couple more weeks even though the discomfort has taken a new level. I am also prepared for the possibility of  having to be induced just like what happened with me and Russ. But that is not what worries me.

What worries me is that we have now confirmation that Russ will be in Exeter for a week, possibly 2 (maybe including the weekend) after the 15th. She is due on the 9th. If she is even a week late, Russ will be 4 hours drive away. I will not be alone, as my dad and step mum arrive tonight, but I would still prefer to have Russ with me through the whole process and I am certainly not prepared for him to miss the birth. I know that it can take hours but it can also be quick and I’m also not happy of Russ to leave a very important client and drive 4 hours under stress and in a hurry. I need him safe and sound and with energy to help me.

The other thing is that my dad is staying for 3 weeks and we tried to arrange it so that he could see his first granddaughter before he leaves. That is the purpose of the visit. But if she is very late and the induction takes ages to work he might miss it.

For now all I can do is wait and see.